These Are The Days

Smart ~ Writer ~ Mom

Make New Friends But Keep The Old

If you were a Girl Scout, you’re probably singing the rest of that lyric.

“One is silver and the other gold…”

In a few days, we’ll be meeting up with some dear friends who live a state away. Our daughters were best friends from age 3 to just last year when they were both 8. It was then that our family moved away and my daughter had to say goodbye to her BFF, Sara. She was heartbroken, but in the year and a half since we’ve been gone, she has adjusted. She’s made new friends and is involved in so many activities it seems as though I’m driving in circles picking her up and dropping her off.

We’re all looking forward to this weekend, but tonight she was worried about something. She said she wasn’t sure Sara would be her “best friend” anymore. Would they still have anything in common? And she felt guilty because she’s made some new best friends here in New Jersey.

I understood what she was saying. I’ve moved quite a bit since I was 20. It’s hard to uproot and move to a different city or state. But as a blogger friend reminded me this week, “we can do hard things.”  So I talked with her and told her it was perfectly OK that she’s made new friends and had new experiences – in fact, it’s wonderful. It’s what she’s supposed to be doing. It’s what life is all about.

I have lots of “silver” friends that I’ve met in the cities where I’ve been lucky enough to live and work. And then I have my “gold” friends. They’re the friends who have laughed and cried with me. The friends who know all my secrets and my faults, but still like me anyway. The people who have always had my back.

I think my daughter used to think that Brownie/Girl Scout song was kind of corny (and it is), but she just realized this evening that Sara is one of her “gold” friends.

13 Comments

  1. What a great post! I have my own collection of gold and silver friends. And we sang that song at Camp Fire camp too! I hope this weekend goes really well.

  2. I love that song! I am happy that your daughter is starting at a young age making friends all over. I too have silver and gold friends, and newer and older friends. Thanks to Facebook so many of us have gotten back in touch with those we lost contact with : ) Best wishes for your blog during NaBloPoMo

  3. Thank you! And believe it or not, I did use your line (and @momastery’s line) “We can do hard things.” Of course, she probably didn’t hear me because it was right after I sang the Make New Friends song at the top of my lungs. Which of course made my daughter cringe with embarrassment 🙂

  4. Thank you! And believe it or not, I did use your line (and @momastery’s line) “We can do hard things.” Of course, she probably didn’t hear me because it was right after I sang the Make New Friends song at the top of my lungs. Which of course made my daughter cringe with embarrassment 🙂

  5. Finding new friends is exciting,but like your daughter I understand feeling bad because you do not want to forget your loyal friends. Everything will work out for her. Its better to have a few loyal and good friends than alot of fake ones. Happy wiriting!

  6. Came here through NaPloPoMo – I am glad I discovered you. I like the idea of gold and silver friends – we have different intimacy with different people depending on how vulnerable we are able to be and the nature of the connections.

    • Thanks so much for finding me! You’ve just reminded me to check out some other blogs from the NaBloPoMo listing – yours is first on my list 🙂
      Thanks again! – Kim

  7. Came here through NaPloPoMo – I am glad I discovered you. I like the idea of gold and silver friends – we have different intimacy with different people depending on how vulnerable we are able to be and the nature of the connections.

    • Thanks so much for finding me! You’ve just reminded me to check out some other blogs from the NaBloPoMo listing – yours is first on my list 🙂
      Thanks again! – Kim

  8. Love it.. How blessed we are..the types of friendships we have can be as individual as our own personalities, just adding to the spice of our lives..

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